Black Cat Boogie
by mew-tsubaki
Summary: Oneshot. As much as Kenma likes to tease him, Kuroo has to wonder if maybe he really is the problem. Or, Kuroo gets a really stupid idea into his head. .::gen fic, no pairs::.


**Black Cat Boogie**

A Haikyuu! oneshot

by mew-tsubaki

Note: The _Haikyuu!_ characters belong to Furudate Haruichi-sensei, not to me. Some randomness featuring no ships for once. :O Read, review, and enjoy!

\- ^-^3

It's a little annoying, but every now and then Kenma will leave the house without him. He doesn't really like waiting for Kuroo, he's told the older boy countless times, and he doesn't need an escort. Kuroo always hastily corrects him, because he's not Kenma's freaking escort—they're best friends. Going to school together is something that best friends do.

"Besides, someone has to be there to pull your head up from your game before you cross the street," Kuroo remarks as they come upon a stoplight.

Kenma lazily drags his eyes up to Kuroo, fixes him with an annoyed look, and begins to cross just as the light turns green. But as soon as they make it to the other side of the street, Kenma's back to clicking away on his handheld.

Kuroo sighs but says nothing more. Honestly, he's used to it. He's known Kenma for years, and very little has changed about the guy. The two most surprising things he's ever done were bleaching his hair and befriending Karasuno's #10. And that's about it. Otherwise Kozume Kenma is an open book—he wakes up easily in the morning because he's always wired to get back to his game before breakfast, he will forget to eat half his breakfast if you don't take his phone from him, he takes good notes in school because he splits his notes half into material from class and half into ideas on how to level up in whatever he's currently playing, he'll whip out his phone if you stop paying attention to him for a second during club, and, once practice is over, his sole attention goes to those devices.

There's nothing bad about Kenma—he's a good kid. But it'd be nicer if he could put the electronics away for a moment…ah, well. Kuroo knows that's impossible, plus he doesn't actually want to change the guy. Otherwise Kenma wouldn't be Kenma. Still…

"You'll need glasses in the not-so-distant future," Kuroo states as they settle on the train to school, him sitting up straight and Kenma slouching against him.

"Mm" is Kenma's retort.

Really, this guy….

\- ^-^3

It's not until practice that he notices.

Kuroo rolls his eyes at Kenma. "What did you manage to do to yourself?" he asks, pointing at the Band-Aid on the setter's left hand.

Kenma glances at it. "Oh. This just happened."

Oh. So it's not as though Kuroo missed something. But still—"Just happened?"

"Just a paper cut. I was flipping through Coach's schedule for us for the next few days, and I got a paper cut." Kenma scratches absentmindedly at the bandage. "It kind of bled a lot, so Yaku freaked out and broke out the first aid kit."

"Really?" Unusual, Kuroo thinks. Kenma rarely injures himself. But, he supposes, one can't really help a paper cut. "Well, take it easy with that hand."

Kenma nods. "Coach already said to focus the ball's weight on my right hand." He peers up at Kuroo. "…you're not going to mother me, are you?"

"What? No," the captain says with a laugh. He resents the attitude a wee bit, but he shrugs it off. It's only a paper cut after all.

\- ^-^3

It's on the walk home, after the train ride, and Kuroo fails to catch him.

"Mmph" is the sound Kenma makes when he trips and falls on his face. He literally falls on his face because both hands are on his PSP, and they manage to keep the device safely from hitting the ground.

Kuroo holds his face in his head, shaking it. "Agh, Kenma…" He offers him a hand up and a tissue, too, when blood dribbles from his nose.

Kenma winces and holds the tissue to his face as they pick up the pace. "Thanks," he says, but it comes out more like "danks" with the tissue muffling his voice.

"I'm always telling you to watch where you're going." He frowns. "You okay?"

Kenma shrugs. They manage to get home without any more trouble. Kenma's mother worries a little when she sees her son, but it's not that big a deal. These things happen.

"Ah, remember not to tilt your head back while it's still bleeding, or you'll end up with a black eye," Kuroo reminds him before he leaves the Kozume house. He snickers. "Otherwise you'll really start to look like a calico. You know, one eye covered in a circle of color."

The setter glares at him. Well, at least Kenma's attitude hasn't been ruined by this. "Goodnight, Kuroo."

"'Night."

\- ^-^3

It's the following morning, and they almost make it halfway without incidence.

But they're going up the stairs to get to the train station, and Kenma knows better. He actually pays attention when climbing stairs and doesn't play at all on them—he never has and he never will. So it comes as a scary surprise when his footing slips and he totters backwards.

"Kenma!" Kuroo yells. He turns at the right moment and reaches out for him—but Kenma slips right through his fingers. Kenma is several steps behind Kuroo. He's outside of Kuroo's long reach.

The setter ends up riding four stairs on his butt, but he's all right. A bystander helps him up, and the commotion abates as Kuroo hops the last step and lands in front of the younger boy. Kenma pats the dust off his butt and grimaces. "That hurt," he grumbles.

"What the—are you really okay?" Kuroo, to be honest, can't hear Kenma very well. His heart's pounding too loudly in his chest.

"I'm fine. It helps that we weren't high up." He pats the inside pocket of his school blazer, and his mood lifts when he confirms that his PSP is safe. "Let's just go."

Kuroo twists his lips around until he finally frowns. "How—"

"These things happen, Kuroo."

The captain eyes him, and he points to the setter's shoes. "Maybe not walking on the backs of your sneakers would help?"

Kenma glances at his shoes. He must really not want to argue this morning, because he pulls the backs up immediately so that his shoes are on properly. Then he heads for the stairs again. "Come on. I don't want to be late."

Kuroo frowns at his back, but he follows the younger boy. His nerves only settle once they're at school and Kenma's in his homeroom. Only then can Kuroo breathe a sigh of relief.

\- ^-^3

It's as though someone's taunting him, however, because misfortunes continue to happen to Kenma, and Kuroo can do nothing about them.

At lunchtime, someone tosses a bucket of dirty water out the window, and it drenches Kenma. In the clubroom, Kenma stubs his toes on the shelving. At practice, he takes a volleyball to the face.

"Now I know how Shouyou feels," he mutters as Kuroo and Kai place him on the bench to sit out for a while.

Shibayama passes Kuroo a cold cloth to place on their setter's face, and Kuroo sits with his best friend for a bit. It's a bit uncomfortable, since Kenma stretched out takes up most of the bench, but Kuroo makes do. "This is getting out of hand," he moans.

"It's nothing. I'll be fine, Kuroo."

"You're accident-prone, Kenma. It's not nothing." He picks up the cloth so their eyes meet. "Has this been happening a lot? Like, even at home?"

"No," Kenma says, a smidge irritably, and he takes the cloth back. "Now go practice. I may yet look like a calico, as you said last night."

Kuroo sulks. "I was only joking," he mumbles as he gets up from the bench.

Calico Kenma—the image isn't as funny as it was before.

\- ^-^3

It's starting to come together in Kuroo's mind.

"So you were fine during your classes?" the captain asks on the train ride home.

Kenma nods. "Yeah. Totally fine." He tears his eyes away from his phone's screen to furrow his brow at his friend. "…why?"

"Nothing," Kuroo lies, and he tousles Kenma's hair to annoy and to distract him.

The train hits something on the track, though, and the cart lurches as though it were a car hitting a bump in the road. Kenma wobbles to the right and bumps his head on the metal post right inside the door. He winces and rubs the forming lump. "Ow…"

Kuroo takes his water bottle from his bag and passes it to the unlucky guy, because he always fills it with ice cold water before leaving school. It's not an ice pack, but it'll have to do until they're home.

Of course, it feels like déjà vu when Kenma's mother tends to her yet again wounded son. She thanks Kuroo, Kenma returns the water bottle, and Kuroo sulks as he walks to the end of the road and enters his own house.

It has to be him, he just knows it.

\- ^-^3

It's just a hypothesis, so he has to test it out.

Kuroo gets up earlier than usual the following day and makes up an excuse to his mother about going to school without Kenma. He texts Kenma the same, and then he's off. It's a little strange, walking and riding by himself.

Fifteen minutes after he gets to Nekoma High, Kenma texts him that he got to school okay without him. Internally, Kuroo breathes a sigh of relief.

As much as is humanly possible, Kuroo sets out on avoiding Kenma for the rest of the day. They don't pass each other in the hallways. They don't eat lunch together. Kuroo and Yaku go to practice together ahead of the others.

"You're acting weird today," Yaku says as they change into their workout clothes and put their things away.

Kuroo doesn't know how to explain himself without Yaku rolling his eyes at him and possibly admonishing him, so he doesn't bother retorting. Besides, Kenma's been okay so far today, so Kuroo thinks that maybe he _is_ doing the right thing. He rereads Fukunaga's requested text from lunchtime, even, saying the three second years had a fine, totally not dangerous lunch together. So now comes the hard part—practice, where he can't avoid the pudding head no matter how hard he tries.

Speaking of which, Kenma enters the clubroom then. His eyes meet Kuroo's and they're a little more indecipherable than normal, so Kuroo is the first to look away.

"I'm going ahead," Kuroo tosses over his shoulder at Yaku, and the libero grumbles about Kuroo being too impatient to wait for him. Kuroo passes by Kenma at the doorway, and he exhales gratefully when the door closes behind him and Kenma's fine.

Then Inuoka comes bounding up the stairs, whining about being late, and he throws the door open with an audible _**thwack**_.

Kuroo cringes.

Lo and behold, Kenma was still close on the other side of the door, and Inuoka had accidentally thrown the door into the setter's right arm. Yet again, Kenma is injured, and Kuroo was around for it.

\- ^-^3

It's confirmed. At least, that's what Kuroo tells Bokuto.

After the incident, the club had been utter chaos. Inuoka couldn't stop apologizing, Shibayama was having no luck consoling him, Yaku was breaking out every ice pack the club owned, Kai had gone ahead to tell the teachers, and Yamamoto and Fukunaga were keeping Lev occupied so that the first year didn't keep hounding Kenma with his dumb questions: "Are you all right? How'd it happen? Does it hurt? Is it purple? Is it broken?" Nothing was broken, but Kenma is sent home by the teachers.

In the background, Kuroo had texted Bokuto, and Bokuto arrives at Nekoma's gate, Akaashi right behind him.

"Kuroo, what are you planning?" Kenma asks quietly.

It pains Kuroo, standing here with Kenma, but at least they'll be separated soon enough. He waves to Bokuto. "Thanks for coming, man."

"Ah, no problem!" Bokuto chirps. "Today's our off day, so Akaashi and I were only going home anyway."

Kuroo smiles gratefully at Akaashi, too. "You leave near us kinda, don't you? Do you mind?"

Akaashi shakes his head.

"Akaashi's taking you home today," Kuroo tells Kenma. He doesn't enjoy bossing Kenma around, but he knows his friend needs a firm hand sometimes.

Kenma gives him a look, but he doesn't argue. He nods his head at Akaashi, the latter does the same, and then the taciturn duo leaves. Bokuto's energy is contained as he eyes the cats. "So…wanna tell me what's going on?"

And Kuroo does tell him. He recounts the events of the past few days, tells him his theory, and says it's just about true.

Bokuto knows when to laugh, though, and when not to laugh. He doesn't laugh now, but there's still a bit of mirth in his golden eyes. "Kuroo…you think you're Kenma's black cat?"

Argh. It'd been said aloud. Kuroo turns and makes for the gym, the owl hovering around him. "I know how stupid it sounds, but it's weird how that's just how things have been lately. It's like, Kenma and I crossed paths and all of a sudden he's getting hurt all of the time."

"It's not as though you've never met before. You're always around him! Why would he be getting hurt only now?" Bokuto slings an arm around his shoulders. "Honestly, Kuroo! Don't be superstitious! You're a person, not a cat! But if you insist on the likeness—just remember that calicos are lucky!" He grins as if he's solved all of Kuroo's problems. "So, hey, my school doesn't have practice today…mind if I join you guys?"

Kuroo eyes him warily. He really hadn't thought it through, texting Bokuto….

\- ^-^3

It's bedtime, and Kuroo reads Akaashi's text for the tenth time that evening:

 _-Kenma was fine on the way home. He said he'd rest. No need to worry, Kuroo-san._

The captain closes his phone and places it on his chest. He stretches his arms behind his head—his muscles ache after receiving Bokuto's spikes—and slows his breathing to a steady rhythm. He's glad he contacted Bokuto and Akaashi, really. Akaashi's reliable and didn't need much of anything explained to him to get him to see Kenma home. And Bokuto—Kuroo likes that they're friends. Bokuto will hear him out even when it comes to the most ridiculous stuff, and he'll take Kuroo seriously. But, as today showed, he knows when to snap Kuroo out of it.

Still… Kuroo can't quite but help the feeling that he's been like some unlucky charm around Kenma recently, and a stubborn part of him refuses to think differently until proven otherwise. And he falls asleep, wondering how much longer he can avoid his best friend.

\- ^-^3

It's different. In all the years they've known each other, this has never happened. But there Kenma is, standing at Kuroo's front door with the glare of a wet cat on his face.

He's known Kenma for years, and very little has changed about the guy. But Kuroo now supposes there are three surprising things he's done, and this is one of them.

"You're an idiot, Kuroo."

Kuroo's shoulders sag, though he honestly doesn't know what he was expecting out of Kenma's mouth, considering that glare. "Good morning to you, too, Kenma." He shoulders his school bag and slips on his shoes, hollering a "Later!" to his parents over his shoulder. He shuts the door behind him and starts walking, Kenma trotting behind him.

"I mean it, Kuroo. Why would you think you're unlucky around me? That's ridiculous."

"Agh, Bokuto—! I told him not to tell you…"

"He didn't. But he tells Akaashi everything, and Akaashi gave me a head's up." He finally falls into step with the taller boy. "And you're being ridiculous."

"Yeah, well, sorry for trying to find a solution! But you only seem to get hurt with me around these days." He grimaces and gives Kenma a look, daring him to fight back.

Surprisingly, Kenma merely sighs. "That's just a coincidence. Besides," he continues, unbuttoning his blazer's sleeve and pushing it up to reveal a large bruise on his left arm, "it happens when you're not around, too."

Kuroo's eyes widen. "But—it was your right arm yesterday—"

Kenma nods. "Correct. Sou opened the door into my right arm. This," he says, pointing to the bruise, "happened last night. At home, not around you."

"What the heck happened?!"

"I went to sit down at the dinner table, missed the chair, and went to catch myself with the table. But I misjudged that and fell anyway."

Kuroo scoffs. "Kenma…what's with you? You're not usually this clumsy."

Kenma eases up some, and he sticks his hands in his pockets as they come upon the stoplight at the crosswalk. "…I've been trying to lose weight."

Wait. "What?" Kuroo can't believe his ears.

"Coach said I was moving sluggishly lately, so they weighed me. I gained weight."

"How?!"

Kenma says it point-blank: "Marathoning Monster Hunter 4, Kuroo."

Ah. Actually, that explains a lot. Kenma tends to tune out the world and eat whatever is in arm's reach when a new game comes out, especially if it's a favorite series. "But…then why…?"

"Simple. Sometimes I zoned out, other times…" The setter averts his gaze. "Um…I might have been a little lightheaded recently…"

Kuroo gives him a look. "So all of this has been happening because you've been eating less instead of eating right?" Kuroo smacks his own forehead. How could he have missed that? Eating little and sleeping the way Kenma does—again, not much, since the kid's always glued to a device—it all makes sense now.

"I've lost a little bit of weight, though…"

"Yeah, well, eat your food properly, you dork." But the admonishment is light and lighthearted, because Kuroo's worries really do disappear from him. Kenma is right—he really can be an idiot sometimes.

They settle on the train, and Kenma takes out his phone, leaning against Kuroo as he plays a puzzle game.

"…you'll need glasses in the not-so-distant future," Kuroo mumbles, a small smile playing on his lips.

"Mm" is Kenma's retort, but a small smile lifts the corners of his mouth, too. It's a "thank you" for worrying about him, and it's another different, new, and surprising thing about him that Kuroo is glad and lucky to have seen.

Bokuto's remark about calicos being lucky briefly reenters Kuroo's brain, and Kuroo's smile widens to a grin.

Calico Kenma and black cat Kuroo—the image is funny again, when Kuroo considers how Kenma might just possibly cancel out his bad luck, if it ever existed in the first place.

\- ^-^3

 **Another luck-themed fic so soon…oh, well. I just really like their friendship, and Kuroo is a bit doting so I can see him overworking himself fretting like this. Even calling up Bokuto and Akaashi… XD I feel for Kenma, though, not only in getting injured but in dealing with Kuroo's ridiculousness. And poor Inuoka for the door incident! :') He didn't mean it… Anyway, yeah. Some Nekoma silliness/fluff, idek. Originally I didn't like the last few lines here, but rereading them, they magically work now? Like wtf? O.o *lol***

 **Thanks for reading, and please review! And check out my other [** _ **HQ!**_ **] fics, too, if you liked this! So rare for me to write something with no pairings, *lol*.**

 **-mew-tsubaki :]**


End file.
